The Internet Ramblings of Nick O'Hare

so i just got back from a small group for a church i dont even go to, which i suppose sounds odd, but nevertheless im looking forward to it. it seems pretty chill... theres a bunch of kids from full sail, which is tight cause theyre all pretty artsy and whatnot. most of them are musicians too, which is cool. AND two of them are professional graphic designers, so that seems really good. its weird how ive been what seems like pretty far from God lately, and then as soon as i start to get back, He's like, "Here, remember that I'm this good to you, and can bless you in ways you never thought possible." never would i have guessed that some random homegroup would have the possibilities to open such doors in my life. im not saying anything will come of this, but it seems like it has definite possibilities. only downside: like half of them are from michigan, and that accent has gotta go...

Okay, last night was manchester orchestra down at the social, and let me tell you, it was pretty sick. in all fairness, the middle act (some guy named john somethingoranother) sucked, but the opening band, All Get Out (myspace.com/loudasallgetout) was dang good. also, ryan and i owned stephen and told him manchester was playing with page france and anathallo, so he just about killed himself. everyone who was with him said he was furious he didnt go, which was super funny to ryan and i. high fives to us. but yeah, so then we came back and chilled with fil for a while, which was nice since i wont see him for a while. actually, now that i think about it, it was for a dang while, and i just woke up at 7 a.m. to have breakfast with him. so yeah, im running on like 3 hours of sleep or something ridiculous like that. totally worth it though, i love that kid. but yeah, i got stuff to do, so bye...

Manchester Orchestra was amazing tonight. more on this later. im tired, its 3:15 am, and im going to bed.

so apparently it became cool somewhere down the line to curse like a sailor and smoke and drink. i guess i missed the "cool" bus or whatever, cause im pretty sure those are privileges reserved for douchebags, but whatever. i mean, i just dont understand. i know there were those who were basically destined for that because they faked their way through christian school and whatnot, but what about the couple who seemed genuine? was that all fake? what about the real moments ive had with them? is the pressure to be accepted by other douchebags that great? when does morality get respected? and if it is respected, then why does no one strive for it?

today was a weird day. everyone left for the mall, so i basically had the apartment to myself. it was odd, i felt like i was in some sort of limbo. i dont know, its hard to explain, but there was this odd feeling of serenity mixed with discontent. almost as if i could have felt either solely with a little effort in either direction. that doesnt make a lot of sense, but whatever. then went to dinner with ryan and lauren, which was good, as fazoli's always is, and chilled at her apartment. jeff and chelsea were there, which is still kinda weird to me, to be honest. i guess it shouldnt be, but it still seems wrong that those two are together. and its weird too, being with those couples brings up that desire that being single always has with it. i suppose i could fill it with useless psuedo-relationships as i see so many people do, which i guess works as a quick fix, but thats not really worth anything. i wonder whats going to become of all these relationships, and what will actually turn into an actual relationship. oh how i hope...

okay, so i just saw cloverfield for the third time in theaters, and im pretty sure it never gets old. its weird, but i get this joy out of my friends enjoying something that i recommend. i dont know, maybe its not weird, but whatever. also, im pretty sure basketball is a waste.

I'm not sure whats going to come of all this mess, but at least its here, right?